In Paul's typical letter style he moves from theology to application. In Ephesians he deals with the practical Christian life in 4:1-6:20, and in particular deals with the business of being subject to one another in 5:21-6:9. The passage before us, 6:1-4, deals with the mutual submission of children and parents. The section is introduced in 5:21 with the general exhortation, "submit to one another, out of reverence for Christ." The exhortations in 5:21-6:20 are based on the principle that a Christian is not to engage in self-assertive behavior which places another at a disadvantage.

v1. The exhortation is simple and straightforward, children must obey their parents. It is their duty to submit to parental authority while in the family home. Once married and in their own home, they are then no longer under parental authority. Such submission is difficult, but is part of the business of mutual submission.

v2-3. To support his exhortation Paul quotes the fifth commandment according to Deuteronomy rather than Exodus, Deut.5:16. He does this to include the phrase "that it may go well with you......" As he says, this is "the first commandment with a promise". Life generally works out best for us when we respect our parents.

v4. The exhortation to parents is that they apply authority to their children in a way which will not promote resentment. The exercise of authority should not be harsh, overbearing, soul-destroying, dehumanizing. As Paul notes in Colossians 3:21, overbearing authority only disheartens the child.

Modern society has brought with it tremendous benefits for young people, yet children today are faced with problems which parents find difficult to control - dissolution of families, a myriad of external influences, "free expression", early puberty, promiscuity..... Christian parents today need to return to the Biblical patterns of family.

In our passage today Paul reminds parents not to provoke their children, but rather nurture them. There are three elements to this nurture.

i] Love. Titus.2:4. Provide a positive family life where the child is encouraged to develop physically, psychologically, socially and spiritually.

ii] Discipline. The Biblical picture is that of nurturing our children by chastening and admonition. Training and directing them, Prov.22:6, controlling them, 1Tim.3:4, and where necessary, with verbal and physical correction, Prov.13:24, 19:18, 22:15, 23:13. The Bible does not encourage excessive violence, punishment prompted by a bad temper or "Victorian" restrictions, nor the suppression of a child's personality.

iii] Instruction. A prime responsibility parents must accept is to teach their children, Deut.4:9, 6:7, 20, 21:19, 31:13, Prov.22:6, Isa.28:9. Instruction consisted of two things:

a) The Law of God. Education involved reading, ethics, Prov.31:1, religion, Deut.6:20-25.

b) A trade. Usually the father taught his son a trade. The best example we have is Jesus himself.

Paul reminded children to obey their parents. Sadly, today, the opposite is often the rule. As one secular writer put it "to be authentically ourselves we must not only declare our independence from whatever is past: we must positively disavow it." There are four elements to the business of submission to parents.

i] Obey, Prov.1:8, 6:20, Col.3:20, 1Tim.5:4. God has established the pattern of the family with the obligation upon parents to rule their children and the obligation upon children to obey in "everything". This obligation is upon children until they "leave" their parents to unite in marriage and so form a new family unit, Gen.2:24. The authority of parents over their children ceases at this point.

ii] Honour, Ex.20:12, Lev.19:3, Deut.27:16, Prov.30:17, Matt.15:4, 1Tim.5:4. Always and at all times give respect to parents when respect is due. Parents who dishonor God cannot expect respect from their children. Dishonor toward parents is expressed in lack of loyalty, love, stubbornness, dissension in the home, cursing, striking or mocking parents. Give honour to parents especially in their old age.

iii] Beware. To dishonor or disobey a parent is to attract God's anger. This is demonstrated in the Old Testament by the punishment meted out for such an offence. eg. hitting or cursing parents is subject to death, Ex.21:15, Lev.20:9. Not obeying a parent is subject to stoning, Deut.21:18-21. Actually, the misbehavior of children is seen as a sign of God's judgement, Isa.3:5, 2Tim.3:2.

iv] Blessed, Deut.5:16, Prov.8:17, 32. Clearly there are social consequences that follow obedience to God's laws. Follow God's plan and it will go well with us. This is the point Paul is making in our passage for study. His point is most likely in the terms of social benefit. It's a good law and works well for us in life.

Discuss the issue of discipline in the light of state laws now limiting physical punishment.